Hal helped me understand Katie?

[NSB]

"Scream Free Marriage" and "Scream Free Parenting". These are books by Hal Runken. I am very excited because I think they have filled a gap for me as to how to put Byron Katie's ideas into practise.

People always recommend Byron Katie around here, but I have had difficulty integrating it into my life. It sounded good but then when thinking about putting it into practise I could only come up with 2 options: suck it up, or walk away. I'm sure that is not what Byron Katie intended but that is how I internalised it.

I don't know if Runken is aware of Katie's work at all, but the way I read it, it is a perfect dumbed-down how-to on being responsible only for yourself, and advocating for yourself in order to preserve a relationship.

Has anyone else read these, and do you agree?

[Anthem]

Hi NSB,

If Hal Runken is working for you and Byron Katie is not then that is probably the way to go.

A question though, have you really sat down and done Byron Katie's method: "the work" on paper as outlined in her book, "Loving What Is"?

This would be recommended rather than trying to understand her philosophy and then attempting to apply it to your life loosely. Her work is really about sitting down and putting your thoughts on paper and answering the questions on each thought and then "turning it around".

Best of luck![]

[Shanti]

Hi NSB,
Wonderful that Hal Runkel's technique worked for you and helped you understand "The Work". There are always certain nuances of a technique that, for some, are hard to understand and at times having it said/explained in some other words makes it easier to understand.

Another technique that was introduced to us during one of the retreats was REBT (Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy ). It is very similar to "The Work".

Finally all these techniques are based on psychology and the human mind and to show a way how to get freedom from the mind obsessions that have us bound to suffering.

Thank you for sharing what has helped you. I am sure there are others who find that "turn it around" step of "the work" difficult, where in they either "suck it up or walk away". So maybe your recommendation here will help them see what the "turn it around" step actually means.