So here is the update, my friends: Got my liability insurance in May, Hawk & I built a lovely round pen, and I did TONS of advertising! The result: ONE call from a mom who said her daughter needed "horse therapy" and was quite excited to begin, until told it would cost $25 and promptly hung up, which was odd since "regular/ nontherapeutic" riding lessons here in town cost the same or more. And one call from a person wanting to be hired. That's it, nothing came of it, nada. The only upside is that I am deducting the horses' living expenses on my taxes, which is helpful.
Meanwhile since last December when I was sure I was being led to sell the farm and open my new studio on the beach where I kept getting so many calls, 3 new studios have opened on the beach, which charge from zero to $5-7 and offer childcare. Now all my students are too broke for yoga classes, except for those who have more than 1 job and/or work on-call many hours and therefore often have to miss class. I had been struggling to keep my trailer-home clean enough for students who may or may not show up and it just wasn't worth it.
I investigated and was turned down for bankruptcy, debt relief, refinance, etc., and as a result my property was audited by the County and my property taxes were raised by 43% and I lost my homestead on the new house we built! Meanwhile, the same day my step-mom died from chemo, I quit my job in oncology; I couldn't stomach it anymore, the work was sporadic anyway and didn't pay nearly enough to be worth the aggravation, especially since it was night-shift.
So I'm like, WTF? how am I ever going to make a living??!! Sobbing as I cleaned my bathroom (I find cleaning therapeutic as it provides a victory, albeit temporary, over entropy), I thought of my first job, when I worked as a maid at age 17, and it suddenly dawned on me, "A maid, I can do this!" God knows I would rather scrub toilets than be chained to a desk typing reports of cancer patients being burned and tortured. With a friend, started a new company called "Clean & Green by Design"
www.cleangreenbydesign.com Friend had to back out due to not being able to find childcare for her 2 kids. So far I've only had a few jobs, some cleaning but mostly painting. It is enjoyable, really hope I can make a living.
If this doesn't work don't know what I will do. Hawk and I actually were offered an opportunity to do our own x-rated videos online, which we would love to do (tastefully, although I realize many would argue against it) - we would have full writing/production rights and could do whatever we want, but we decided against it due to the recent scandals in the yoga community and the fact, as Jenna Jamison has pointed out in her autobiography, people WILL find out...
So the current plan is to do the cleaning/design and then in May when my tenant moves out, I will move into the new house (thereby reclaiming my homestead) and use it as my new yoga studio and get the advertising going again. Recently learned that Hawk could qualify for food stamps and all kinds of government assistance, especially if he gets custody of his kids, but ONLY if I move out. So I guess that's what I will do. and if THAT doesn't work, beats the hell out of me WTF I am going to do to make a living, but since I've pretty much lost my ability to worry about the future, I guess que sera sera, whatever will be, will be! I am just extremely grateful that all this bullsh*t is happening NOW, after my reality shifted, because if it had happened previously I would never have been able to handle it...