"Real" gone from "reality"

[mr_anderson]

All sense perceptions seen through, not believed,
All thoughts seen through, not believed,
All emotions seen through, not believed,
All bodily sensations seen through, not believed,
All experience recognized as flotsam floating on the sea of awareness,
All are perceptions existent only in the mind,
The “real” gone from “reality”,
Everything as it should be,
Freedom.

Using the words above to describe insight increasingly experienced recently. A glance in the mirror reveals only a visual image in the mind, floating through awareness, shockingly empty of self. Once the image of a human face was believed to be “myself”. Reality, once harsh and heavy, now empty, transient.

This is state of insight is not constant, but there are continual flashes of this perception occurring, with increasing regularity, and intensity. Generally for a few seconds at a time. Continual questions naturally arising in awareness: who or what is seeking? Who am I? Is there an experiencer of this experience? This is also accompanied by allowing the mind to be, allowing the thoughts to be, allowing the emotions to be, but just noting them, being aware of them, sometimes gently bringing the stories behind them into clearer focus. Not trying to change anything, but noting the desire to change things if it arises.

This is pretty fun, there this immense lightness to the perceptions. Then there are also other times when perceptions are deeply identified with, and it's back to suffering. But overall, the whole illusion is becoming increasingly transparent.

[maheswari]

[_Yogi_]

Im starting to notice this too... its wild.

[AumNaturel]

Wonderful, Josh! When did these flashes of perception first occur, if you don't mind me asking? Was it at all surprising or unexpected very first few times?

[Anthem]

Thanks for posting this Mr. Anderson.

I've notice that life often brings these highly enjoyable periods of clarity almost as a strengthening and resting time prior to periods of turbulence that can come from seeing through more of the illusion. The length of these periods of turbulence are dependent on our receptivity and willingness to see what limiting beliefs are being revealed. A few seconds and we remain in equanimity, longer and we suffer until we listen and realize the beliefs aren't worth it. Funny how stubbornly we can inadvertently hold on to our world views!

[karl]

And then......there's more.......much, much more.

[mr_anderson]

AumNaturel - This occurred as a direct result of what I call meditatively "investigating direct experience". It's like self inquiry, but more immediate in the results it brings, and far more effective (IMO) than asking repeatedly asking questions such as "Who Am I?". The process negates false beliefs and impressions, thereby naturally revealing what is true. Greg Goode (The Direct Path) and Rupert Spira are excellent guides for this process. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lAEwC4VjvyE There's a meditation here in this video at either 42 minutes or 52 minutes I think with Rupert Spira.

For the good of anyone who happens to be interested in my ramblings, here is my guide to investigating direct experience. Been feeling the urge to write this for ages, so this isn't for anyone, I just have to write this. It's easy to see what is true for yourself. It may seem like a mental exercise at first, I certainly just felt a bit confused when first using this practice. But I stuck with it, and suddenly experience became transparent and two-dimensional, seen clearly as empty and illusory as a projection on a screen.

Once again disclaimer: this is not neo-advaita. For me this questioning led to a direct awakening experience, which is on-going, and I absolutely support furthering this kind of practice with deep meditation etcetera. It may however seem very intellectual at first, in fact, at first I thought it was stupid. Little did I know that using the mind to negate un-truth is an incredibly powerful spiritual practice. I'm extremely non-plussed by neo-advaita which leads into an intellectual cul-de-sac unverified via direct experience of boundless freedom. This Jnana Yoga, a direct, powerful, and transformative spiritual practice, which has got a bit of a bad name with poor quality neo-advaita gurus who spout unhelpful statements, like 'you are already awake'. True in the absolute sense, but not helpful out of context.

This investigation is going to take us into direct experiential recognition that:

a) you are not a body-mind that is called a name.

b) you are simply conscious of a body-mind that is called a name, but it is not you.

c) the body-mind that is called a certain name and seems to be the main character in 'experience' is not conscious.

d) In fact consciousness is conscious of the body-mind, the body-mind is not conscious, and you are that which is present and aware, yet completely free from and untouched by experience, here, right now.

This is about questioning our most basic 'common sense' assumptions about what is true. Repeatedly. Until they dissolve and reality is revealed.

Part 1 (Part 2 to come when I have time)

Here's how we normally perceive the world:

ME [body, thoughts, emotions] - WORLD [everything outside of body, thoughts and emotions]

This 'me' perceives a separate 'world'.

Is there an objective reality, that exists outside of conscious experience?

Let's examine what we can absolutely know is true about our experience:

I am conscious. Is this not apparent? You are conscious? (And notice we don't define what 'I am' is, I'm not referring to a human being or any conceptual idea of "who" the "i am" that is conscious, is.)

There is an experience occurring. Is this not also apparent? The reality of the experience and our beliefs about it may be questioned, but there's still some sort of experience taking place.

The experience seems to consist of thoughts, emotions, and sense perceptions.

Do we know anything other than our experience? And the fact that we are conscious of it?

The answer is no. Assuming that there is an objective reality that actually exists apart from consciousness of it, is to me a huge leap of faith and quite possibly erroneous.

All we know are sense perceptions and thoughts/feelings about them. We could be brains floating in jars being stimulated into imagining a real-seeming experience by electrodes (doubtful, but no more probable than there actually being an existent objective reality that exists independently of perception, yet is completely unverified by science)

How can you truly verify that anything exists outside of what you experience? Any 'verification' you got would just be another experience.

Can you somehow get 'outside' of what you experience, and know that anything, any kind of objective world, exists outside of experience itself?

No, you cannot. Even a scientific experiment, watching atoms or something, is simply an experience in the mind of the scientist.

It may reveal the rules and laws of the dream world, but there's no way to determine whether the world which the experiments are conducted in is dream or reality.

So the answer to is there an objective reality, that exists outside of conscious experience, can only be "I don't know, it's possible, but I don't know". Unless we want to believe something, and then call a belief in the mind "true".

Who is conscious?

Is the body conscious?

Now the questioning process that lead to a complete transformation of experiencing for me, combined with so much total freedom from identification, was trying to find out who or what was conscious of this experience.

Let's look at this assumption people have: "you" some sort of bag filled with skin, flesh and bones and internal thoughts/emotions are conscious of an external "world" some sort.

Let's see if we have any direct experience of a bag of skin filled with flesh and bones being conscious.

Look at your arm. In truth, you don't even experience an arm, you experience a visual image with some colors in it, a sense perception. You call certain colors 'arm'.

Do you have any experience of this visual image, sense perception, called 'arm' being conscious? Or does it seem that consciousness precedes the visual image called 'arm'?

In other words, is the visual image 'arm' conscious, or are you conscious of a visual image and labeling part of it as 'arm'? The answer is obviously the latter.

What about sensations? Close your eyes and experience the sensations. There's a mass of constantly changing sensations, two of sensation groups we label 'arms'.

Do you experience a sensation being conscious? Is the sensation which you also call 'arm' conscious? Or are you conscious of the sensation? The answer is obvious.

Do this for the whole body. All the visual images of it. All the sensations of it. Can you find a single visual image or sensation of this item we call "body" that is conscious? For example if you make a funny face and scratch your head, is that image of a funny face, or the sensation of 'scratch head' conscious? Or is there just consciousness of these visual images and sensations?

Perhaps you have a concept of a body called by your name, that is conscious. And you believe that conceptual idea to be true.

But look, is a "conceptual idea of a conscious body" conscious? Or is there consciousness of this conceptual idea of the body being conscious?

Are thoughts conscious?

Firstly, we use the term 'mind' to refer to thoughts. In fact, we don't experience anything called 'mind' (except a concept of it), we experience only the thoughts we are thinking now, which may include memories of having had different thoughts.

Think a thought. Think a thought which says "I am conscious".

Is that thought, "I am conscious", conscious? Or is there consciousness of the thought?

Apply to all thoughts. Notice if you can find a thought which you experience as being conscious, or simply 'consciousness of thoughts'.

Apply to emotions.

Apply to visual images again. Including visual images of body.

Apply to all your concepts of being a body that is conscious.

Apply to thoughts again.

Apply to sensations.

What you will find is absolutely nothing that YOU (the self) experiences is conscious. You are certainly are conscious, but nothing that you, as consciousness, experience.. is conscious. Consciousness alone is conscious. And you are THAT.

This lead for me to a radical dis-identification from EVERYTHING in experience, giving (paradoxically) an experience of everything having an empty, transparent quality, and an experiencing of my SELF as absolutely joyously free from the contents of experience.

No longer pre-supposing myself to be an object (body, thought, emotion) which is somehow simultaneously an object of consciousness, yet also conscious (a subject).

Does that even make sense? For the body to be simultaneously a subject (experiencing) yet also an object (experienced). If you look closely - a body is an object, it is experienced, not experiencing.

This is true of thoughts.

This is true of emotions.

This is true of anything and everything that is perceptible.

So who is conscious, and where is consciousness?

Does consciousness/awareness have a physical location?
and
Is consciousness perceptible?


Walk two steps forwards and two steps backwards.

Did consciousness move?

Sensations changes. Visual images changed. Thoughts might've arisen about what was happening.

But did consciousness move? Keep investigating that one.

What is truer, if I hit you on the head with a hard hammer, does consciousness itself stop?

Memories might stop.
Thoughts might stop.
Sense perceptions might stop.

But what your talking about is experience stopping. Not consciousness.

We've already found that consciousness can't be found in experience. There's no experience which is conscious, just consciousness of experience. Just because there are no memories, sense perceptions, thoughts, doesn't mean there is no consciousness.

Is consciousness perceptible?

If you could perceive consciousness, wouldn't that just be another experience of which consciousness was conscious?

I encourage you to investigate, not to accept, any of this. With a deep commitment to knowing what is true.

I can't be bothered to write anymore, but I found this new way of investigating direct experience incredibly exciting and interesting, whilst also being confusing (sometimes they say confusion happens when we are unlearning), so I pursued it passionately.

Some sort of deep dis-identification occurred, and the entire quality of experience has changed as a result. Somehow simply knowing via exploration:

I am conscious. In fact, I AM Consciousness.

I am free from this experience of a person.

I am not an object of consciousness, I am that which is conscious of objects.

I am non-locatable, imperceptible, yet always, obviously present and aware.

Led to so much freedom. The clear-seeing of this whole system of thoughts, emotions and sense perceptions, from the completely dis-identified viewpoint of impersonal consciousness, actually directly invigorated experience with blissful, ecstatic and boundless freedom of the changeless self.

This is absolutely not, in my opinion, enlightenment, just some lovely and beautiful change. The body mind, that people refer to as Josh, is still doing his thing. He likes computer games. He still has desires, and enjoys things. At times he becomes sad or grumpy, though these things are pretty rare due to the sense of constant ecstatic freedom. He still makes some fairly ridiculous mistakes, and there is reaction, or at least the residue of reaction, to say praise or criticism.

I continue to explore direct experience and practice AYP, simply for the love of it, but increasingly the paradox is this illusory experience of a 'personal self' increasingly becomes free from the concerns of a personal self, instead taking on the changeless, timeless, boundless freedom of impersonal consciousness

Anthem - agreed!

and Karl

[Anthem]

Thanks for taking the time to share this inquiry, very enjoyable![]