BlueRaincoat
United Kingdom
1486 Posts
Posted - May 04 2015 : 12:32:38 PM Show Profile Email Poster Edit Reply Reply with Quote View user's IP address Get a Link to this Reply Delete Reply
Hello my friends
I have got news on the sensitivity front - I have been feeling a lot more stable since the beginning of March.
The energy is still there, but there is less friction. I feel the obstruction that was causing the turbulence is much reduced. The back pain is less and there is generally more peace. Also I'm less prone to being carried away by flights of bhakti these days.
I have not stepped up practices significantly yet - breath meditation still seems the most appropriate practice, but mulabandha is coming up automatically and it's not overloading me (big development!). I'm trying to move towards mantra meditation and some days that is taking off. Most days however the breath seems to impose itself over the mantra. When that happens, I stay with the breath.
I expect I will have more to report after I come out of the current fasting period. The increased stability came with a need to lighten my diet. At the moment I'm eating pretty much vegan. This is not my normal diet, so I call it a fast and I count it as one of the practices (I did love my dairy rich diet, but my joints got a bit stiff, so a little fast will do me good).
That's about it - a bit long winded, but I wanted share the fact that my sensitivity is reducing. Will keep you posted.
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BillinL.A.
USA
375 Posts
Posted - May 04 2015 : 1:33:37 PM Show Profile Email Poster Edit Reply Reply with Quote View user's IP address Get a Link to this Reply Delete Reply
So good to hear things are going better for you Blue.
A lot of AYP forum peoples depend on you. At least I know I do.
Your comment about dairy and joint stiffness struck me and so I've been reading up on it.
Butter and cheese I use as major protein sources and get joint inflammation often but I never connected the two. I'm going to cut way down on them.
Anyway thanks for the heads-up.
Nice article here about it:
http://www.onegreenplanet.org/natur...-a-bad-idea/Go to Top of Page
BlueRaincoat
United Kingdom
1486 Posts
Posted - May 04 2015 : 2:54:39 PM Show Profile Email Poster Edit Reply Reply with Quote View user's IP address Get a Link to this Reply Delete Reply
Thank you BillinL.A. I am honoured to be given any insights that might help anyone in any small way. Between us, I think we're bound to come up with some good answers in these forums, as we bring to the table a variety of situations and experiences.
Thank you for the link. I wasn't aware dairy had been specifically linked to joint inflammation. I have to say I like it very much, but I have always felt some vegan breaks to be very beneficial to my health and mood. After these breaks I return to a mostly vegetarian diet and enjoy milk and cheese even more. Till I stop enjoying it and then I know it's time for the next vegan break (or rice fast).
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Dogboy
USA
1583 Posts
Posted - May 04 2015 : 5:06:43 PM Show Profile Email Poster Edit Reply Reply with Quote View user's IP address Get a Link to this Reply Delete Reply
Happy for you Sister Blue!
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BlueRaincoat
United Kingdom
1486 Posts
Posted - May 06 2015 : 04:53:34 AM Show Profile Email Poster Edit Reply Reply with Quote View user's IP address Get a Link to this Reply Delete Reply
Thank you Dogboy!
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Beehive
USA
115 Posts
Posted - May 07 2015 : 12:17:34 AM Show Profile Email Poster Edit Reply Reply with Quote View user's IP address Get a Link to this Reply Delete Reply
This is an incredibly helpful thread.... even to a new person. Maybe especially to a new person! I've noticed in the lessons that there is a tendency to not be too specific about overload, sensitivity, purification - no doubt for the reasons that it is both complicated and different in each person as well as to discourage people from creating it for themselves. But I actually thought my nervous system was so unsettled that I wouldn't know if it was overloaded or not. Then just this week as some odd fear and extreme fatigue hit I read this thread and felt my first knowingness and relief from self pacing.
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Bodhi Tree
2972 Posts
Posted - May 07 2015 : 02:15:06 AM Show Profile Email Poster Visit Bodhi Tree's Homepage Edit Reply Reply with Quote View user's IP address Get a Link to this Reply Delete Reply
Thank you for the good news, BlueRC.
As of late, I am fond of contemplating the 5 elements (water, air, earth, fire, inner space), and how they relate to my purification and opening. I'm of the mind that befriending--and dare I say mastering them--will be highly advantageous. Sounds like you are on a similar track as you fine-tune your diet, which is a kind of romance with these elements.
We are making love to the matrix of the cosmos.
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BlueRaincoat
United Kingdom
1486 Posts
Posted - May 07 2015 : 08:54:59 AM Show Profile Email Poster Edit Reply Reply with Quote View user's IP address Get a Link to this Reply Delete Reply
Thank you Cody.
Yes, it nice to be able to fine-tune. The last few months my diet was driven by kundalini. I just had to eat to keep on top of it. A respite at last. Hurrah for stability!
A slightly different way of being in love with the universe.
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Bodhi Tree
2972 Posts
Posted - May 20 2015 : 7:29:47 PM Show Profile Email Poster Visit Bodhi Tree's Homepage Edit Reply Reply with Quote View user's IP address Get a Link to this Reply Delete Reply
Update
A symptom of purification that has been recurring for me is...fuzziness. I feel a fuzziness all around my body. Sometimes it is pleasant, sometimes a little overbearing. The sensation kind of feels like being wrapped in an electric blanket, and the blanket itself is made of inner space (akasha). Therefore, there can be a hyper-sensitivity to my immediate surroundings, as well as to far-away happenings.
I think part of the sensitivity is a result of lack of buffer (due to internal abrasiveness from my past), and so I keep doing things to increase the inner firewall buffer--not just energetically, but for the cellular organism (fine-tuning diet, hydration, and again, integrating all four elements). There is definite improvement, but I wish for the day when the fuzziness has dissolved completely into a zero-friction interface. Believe me, I have experienced that kind of fluidity before for a couple years of adolescence (pre-drug use), so I know it's possible to sustain for long stretches, maybe even permanently. Now I am directly experiencing the meaning of: "You don't know what you have until you've lost it." The clarity of perception cannot be taken for granted.
Anyone experience that kind of fuzz and/or friction?
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Charliedog
1551 Posts
Posted - May 21 2015 : 03:43:46 AM Show Profile Email Poster Visit Charliedog's Homepage Edit Reply Reply with Quote View user's IP address Get a Link to this Reply Delete Reply
quote:
Originally posted by Bodhi Tree
Update
A symptom of purification that has been recurring for me is...fuzziness. I feel a fuzziness all around my body. Sometimes it is pleasant, sometimes a little overbearing. The sensation kind of feels like being wrapped in an electric blanket, and the blanket itself is made of inner space (akasha). Therefore, there can be a hyper-sensitivity to my immediate surroundings, as well as to far-away happenings.
I think part of the sensitivity is a result of lack of buffer (due to internal abrasiveness from my past), and so I keep doing things to increase the inner firewall buffer--not just energetically, but for the cellular organism (fine-tuning diet, hydration, and again, integrating all four elements). There is definite improvement, but I wish for the day when the fuzziness has dissolved completely into a zero-friction interface. Believe me, I have experienced that kind of fluidity before for a couple years of adolescence (pre-drug use), so I know it's possible to sustain for long stretches, maybe even permanently. Now I am directly experiencing the meaning of: "You don't know what you have until you've lost it." The clarity of perception cannot be taken for granted.
Anyone experience that kind of fuzz and/or friction?
Bodhi,
The closer to the stillness the more sensitivity occurs. It is my believe and experience that the more open, the more you take in, also from further away. I hear you. There is also the paradox, the pain of the other, you feel it and would like to solve it. You would like to do something about it, to make them feel better. But also that is a doing and not possible, because everybody is unique, has his or her own path to follow. On the other hand it is also not a not doing, you can be there for the other, share an experience which helped you. Be in his or her company and then stay neutral, not being irritated because your wise advise is not heard....been there, done that. There will be a moment you say to yourself ok now its done, I will stop with helping, let it be. Let him or her talk, be interested, do not give advise, stay with myself. That can feel hard, because you would like them to be happy, you love him or her. You can not give happiness, happiness is from inside out. Everybody has to find that inside. And then sometimes after some time, you will see little miracles.
Live is unfolding in my opinion, it is not a doing and not a not doing. It is be-ing, sharing, loving.
When the apple is ripe it falls of the tree, in the apple is aleady the apple tree and the new apple. You can not force it to grow....
The friction is a sign that you need to surrender, to who you really are at this moment. You are not the boy with the personal problems anymore, you know this.
If I may advise you , take time for yourself, only you, alone, in silence, write a song with all your deepest feelings, play your guitar be still and listen, Listen to your silence, all ingredients are there, you are on the right track.
Love
Edit; there was a time I was constantly aware of the ending of all things, nice moments, unhappy moments, all ending.
Edited by - Charliedog on May 21 2015 04:21:34 AM
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Bodhi Tree
2972 Posts
Posted - May 21 2015 : 12:55:11 PM Show Profile Email Poster Visit Bodhi Tree's Homepage Edit Reply Reply with Quote View user's IP address Get a Link to this Reply Delete Reply
Thank you, Charliedog. I think you're spot on about the sensitivity. It comes part and parcel with the proximity to stillness. It's definitely not like being sedated, or in a trance, but rather being fully alive. It's a good deal.
I will take your advice about songwriting and deep feelings. That's a great way to smooth things out.
