Self-Inquiry -- A Practice Between our Meditations

[Etherfish]

Me too. I have to turn my thoughts off when they keep coming up with BS reactions. When we don't like what's happening around us, it's usually because we have a preconceived notion of what's perfect, instead of just watching what happens without comparing it to anything.

[Shanti]

Sorry to make you guys read my silly posts on my little triumphs.. hopefully my last one in this thread...

In one of the above posts I had talked about making a conscious effort to live in the present.. well I saw the positive results of it on Sat. On Sat my girls had their annual music recital. There were 60 items on the program.. it is a long affair. I was in charge of making sure the recital itself ran smoothly, without any major disruptions  and on time (very important.. when 50 kids participate,(all solo and a few group songs)the pgm can go on forever).

Anyway.. any other time, I would have been going over what I would have to do in my head.. go over the participant list and the MC list and the program guide... and a gazillion details.. again and again for a few days. But this time I kept reminding myself I have to go over the stuff, but something in me refused to get all worried and tensed and just kept me away from it all. The first time I looked at the papers was a half hour before the pgm.. and I did not even have to think.. I had it all figured out. I had the participants in place when they had to be up on stage (50 of them) .. One of them was done and the next one was ready with their music and instrument (when required, the instruments were varied.. tablas, sitar, keyboard) .. and the MCs(11 of them) on their toes, not wasting even one second..  and the awards and certificates in place. This was the first year the pgm ran on time, without one single problem.. we did not even run 5 mins over..
Now, I thought that was amazing.. I know many of you will think its silly.. but this was the first time I saw my self inq (inner silence) at work... It was not me.. I did it all.. but I actually did nothing.. OK!!  that is crazy.. Sorry guys...(ummmm..after Yoda's post on amaroli.. I have to think before I use this smiley again)

[sadhak]

Hi Yogani,
Verbose self enquiry for me, always stonewalled... I was always looking for ways to get off the hook, or make myself look better. When I encountered harshness in verbal or real responses to my self-enquiry, I could see myself... but the image depressed me so much that it almost froze the process.

Meditation over a time has indeed, as you say, cultivated the inner silence necessary for that self-enquiry without the debilating self-judgement or self-criticism.

There is so much theory around. I feel solid examples with multiple approaches to the same situation, to suit different kinds of people could help more get there faster.

It's like a place which offers not only the most updated version of the vehicle, but also vehicles of all categories: MUVs, bikes, aircraft, autos, cycles, rickshaws...

It's a tall order. But that's what you're seemingly headed towards.

I'm writing this fuzzily, because there's something important here...but I don't know whether I've spotted it or if I have, expressed it clearly.

[Etherfish]

Shanti wrote:
"Now, I thought that was amazing.. I know many of you will think its silly.. but this was the first time I saw my self inq (inner silence) at work... It was not me.. I did it all.. but I actually did nothing.. OK!! that is crazy.. Sorry guys..."

Don't be sorry- it's not silly at all! i've worked a little with stage productions too; it can be really hard. This is the same thing we all run into; we have the illusion that we control things, so we control too much.
I've had very similar revelations. i've always tried to do my best but got caught up in worrying about the outcome. Then I realized: If I am relaxed, and doing everything I can, who cares if the whole thing goes wrong- it would have nothing to do with my effort! So I decided to put ALL my energy into doing what I'm doing at the moment instead of splitting some of it off on worrying. I decided I don't care if it all goes wrong.

It had an interesting outcome. I found I was actually doing better than before because the worrying was taking some of my energy.

[yogani]

Hi Sadhak:

Yes, for many, self-inquiry is a mind swamp full of mosquitoes, quicksand and alligators. No place to stand except on egoic suppositions, which will take us on wild goose chases through the swamp every time.

Real self-inquiry is beyond all that. It rests in our silence, which means the entire process depends on something that came before, another method, deep meditation, which brings about the rise of the witness. That is the thing, you know. Either that, or the witness is present already (via previous efforts), a la Tolle, Katie and others who wake up one day like that, and they tell us all about how to take it from there, from their waking-up point. Well, fine, but from where is that?! So we end up genuflecting at the altar of their mysterious condition -- a condition we could easily cultivate for ourselves, if only we knew how. Meditate!

Just as you say, without inner silence it is pretty fuzzy. But look what happens with some simple inner silence creeping up. Shanti manages a stage production without even trying. Bravo! Stillness in action! Encore!

So what do we need self-inquiry for? Well, for the same reason we need bhakti. These things will move us forward if taken to our deepest levels in stillness. Besides making the day (between the meditations) much more interesting, these processes give us understanding and perspective on the gift within us. More than that -- they give us energetic stillness, alive and moving outward from us into the world. There is no doubt we can make better use of our stillness if we learn a few good methods (or non-methods), and self-inquiry is about that.

Stillness blends with mind, emotions and ecstasy, and that is the process of enlightenment going forward. It is an automatic process. There is little we have to do but let go into what we are, once we experience that we are That ... all the strategies are for That. Enter Tolle, Katie, Ramana Maharishi, et al. Until then, it is all a big fuzz, a mind swamp. Inner silence is our boat. Let's arrange for the boat before we go too far into the swamp. It is common sense...

The guru is in you.

[yogani]

Etherfish said: "So I decided to put ALL my energy into doing what I'm doing at the moment instead of splitting some of it off on worrying. I decided I don't care if it all goes wrong. It had an interesting outcome. I found I was actually doing better than before because the worrying was taking some of my energy."

Hi Etherfish:

You are absolutely right. Self-inquiry is about choice. And so is bhakti/karma yoga, which you are also touching on there.

Traditionally, jnana yoga/self-inquiry is called the "path of discrimination."

But on what basis are we choosing? Knowing that rational thinking is a minefield, it would seem that choosing the path of least complication, least worry and angst, would the most rational (!) way. At least until our deepest hot buttons get pushed, and then we are back into the mire.

What we need is that which is beyond all thinking, inner silence. That is the table upon which everything else in us rests, hot buttons and all. Once we know we are the table (a permanent state of being), it is much easier to move the stuff around on the table to suit the need of the moment, or clear it all off the table at will. It is our choice.

Become inner silence and the choices become easy -- self-inquiry becomes easy. Everything we do before that is a temporary solution -- a negotiation of thinking with thinking.

There is no negotiation between the witness and thinking. The witness permeates thinking and thinking (and all resulting action) dissolve into pure divine purpose. Then there can be lots of thinking and action coming through us as the divine flow pours out. And all we do is watch, in a continual state of ecstatic bliss. That is what we are...  

The guru is in you.      

[rabar]

Hi, friends!  
I've been busy elsewhere, but catching up here and so happy to experience all the good energies and thoughts!
I have a simple practice I do when taking our dog Riqui for walks. If I'm facing the sun, then I move into a bhakti relationship with the Source, 'walking into the light,' so to speak. If I walk with the sun to my left, I relate to him as 'Mitra,' a Sanskrit name for the sun that means 'Friend.' If I walk away from the sun, I move into the silent mind and merge with the Source who then enjoys the experience of inhabiting me while I move into my doggie's body temporarily. With the sun on my right, I enjoy Her as a female companion (actually I identify her as my darling partner). So within the span of a brief walk, I get to practice I-Thou, I-He, I-I and I-She.  Sort of like Wilber's 'All Quadrants' approach! Speaking of Wilber, I highly recommend the dialogue between Wilber and Andrew Cohen in the current issue of "What Is Enlightenment?" magazine titled "The Birth of An Integral Spirituality" (Integral Spirituality is the title of Wilber's about-to-be published new book). If you can't find the issue on the newstands, drop me a line and I'll see if I can point you to a summary. "What is Enlightenment?" does tend to post their old issues on line once they're no longer current.