psysaucer
India
44 Posts
Posted - Dec 19 2015 : 05:03:27 AM Show Profile Email Poster Edit Topic Reply with Quote View user's IP address Get a Link to this Message Delete Topic
Several times a week, this utterly puzzling feeling of "who am i? where is the center that's perceiving and responding to the world?" takes over me completely. It is a terribly bewildering feeling to search for the self without any expectation or hope for even stumbling upon it. It's like knowing for a fact that there is no answer to the question "where is the self?" is itself worth the trouble trying to look for it.
But when I sit down and try to replicate this feeling, and put this question to myself(without the question itself coming to me), it seems so fake no matter what I do.
Where do I go from here?
AYPforum
351 Posts
Posted - Dec 19 2015 : 09:23:50 AM Show Profile Email Poster Edit Reply Reply with Quote View user's IP address Get a Link to this Reply Delete Reply
Moderator note: Topic moved for better placement
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CarsonZi
Canada
3189 Posts
Posted - Dec 19 2015 : 10:14:32 PM Show Profile Email Poster Visit CarsonZi's Homepage Edit Reply Reply with Quote View user's IP address Get a Link to this Reply Delete Reply
Hi psysaucer,
For me, the most effective inquiries are the ones that arise naturally. I've used a few different methods of "forced" inquiry in the past (The Work for example), but the inquiries that have been life changing for me were always ones that came spontaneously.
I'm not sure that there is anything we can specifically "do" in order to increase the incidence of revelatory spontaneous inquiry, but remaining as diligent as possible in watching for our personal tendencies and triggers to come up seems to be the precursor in my experience.
Hope this helps.
Love,
Carson
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mr_anderson
USA
734 Posts
Posted - Dec 20 2015 : 09:17:33 AM Show Profile Email Poster Visit mr_anderson's Homepage Edit Reply Reply with Quote View user's IP address Get a Link to this Reply Delete Reply
Agree with Carson here.
It's a very good sign that you are sensitive and aware to the feeling of whether your inquiry is natural, or false.
In fact, being aware of whether your inquiry is natural or false, is in itself an inquiry.
Inquiry is just looking to see what is true in any given moment, from the relative to the absolute levels.
So being able to look within and see the truth about your inquiry - whether it's natural and spontaneous or false and based upon an effort of will - is already a good step.
Sometimes I'll notice false inquiry arising in my experience. For example, let's say I'm experiencing a feeling of intense anger. Sometimes a false inquiry might arise with that anger, such as the common inquiry "What Am I?".
If this question arises spontaneously, often it will cause a complete dissolution of the sense of being separate, and a recognition of complete unity/non-division with everything in the field of experience.
If it arises in a false way, it's just a memory coming up of un-divided experience from the past, and it is the ego trying to force experience into a more comfortable and pleasurable state.
But I can sense when this inquiry is false, when it's coming from a place of attempting to change or control experience in some way.
I'll ask myself "What is really true in this moment?" and the insight comes "There's something within me that is trying to use inquiry to change or alter the current experience. It's coming from a place of resistance. It's obvious that this is just manipulation, not true inquiry, which arises from a spirit of spontaneous curiosity and love of truth".
So inquiry is just about seeing clearly, seeing what is clearly true in any given moment. It requires a great deal of sensitivity, to unravel one's own blind-spots and self-deception. You have to be able to feel within yourself what is true, and what is delusion. Your innate awareness has this ability to separate truth from delusion.
Edited by - mr_anderson on Dec 20 2015 09:24:11 AM
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parvati9
USA
587 Posts
Posted - Dec 20 2015 : 12:32:41 PM Show Profile Email Poster Edit Reply Reply with Quote View user's IP address Get a Link to this Reply Delete Reply
quote:
Originally posted by psysaucer
Several times a week, this utterly puzzling feeling of "who am i? where is the center that's perceiving and responding to the world?" takes over me completely. It is a terribly bewildering feeling to search for the self without any expectation or hope for even stumbling upon it. It's like knowing for a fact that there is no answer to the question "where is the self?" is itself worth the trouble trying to look for it.
But when I sit down and try to replicate this feeling, and put this question to myself(without the question itself coming to me), it seems so fake no matter what I do.
Where do I go from here?
Hi Psysaucer
In the OP, you asked: "Where is the center that's perceiving and responding to the world?" It is nowhere in particular. It is not in your body any more than it is in your best friend, a flower, or a bug. It is also nowhere. Words aren't very helpful in describing the true Self. And to know It, is to be It. It is beyond the mind's ability to grasp, and beyond normal sense perception. However mindfulness, which helps us to pay attention to the present moment, works in conjunction with inquiry to facilitate Self realization.
Once the mind accepts that it will never be able to pin this Self down to a limiting concept, it will re-structure itself and dutifully carry on. The mind is poor master, but excellent servant. Ego continues as a servant of our expanded awareness. (Undoubtedly you are familiar with all this)
Agree with Carson in that spontaneous inquiry is more helpful than forced. But establishing a disciplined routine and then letting go, seems to encourage and cultivate the spontaneous inquiry.
It may be just as appropriate to say namaste to a cloud or a rock as to say it to a person. The true Self apparently does not see the world comprised of objects as real. The illusion of objects is very real to me, and I would appreciate advice in seeing a world without the boundaries objects appear to have.
love
parvati
edit/ shortened for easier reading
Edited by - parvati9 on Dec 21 2015 12:17:01 AM
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Stefos
USA
3 Posts
Posted - Dec 02 2017 : 8:49:58 PM Show Profile Email Poster Edit Reply Reply with Quote View user's IP address Get a Link to this Reply Delete Reply
Hi Everyone,
I'm new here but I'd like to contribute here.
Self Inquiry or Atma Vichara is going to the root of the "I" thought.
So.....it kind of goes like this:
Who am I?
I'm Stefos
Who is saying that?
I am
Who is THAT I?
Silence happens.........No thought happens
Sarva Mangalam
Stefos
