Hello everyone!
Since "going public" with my "cancer story" in Satsang Cafe, I have received emails from people wanting to know how it came about that I said no to chemotherapy and radiation. First of all, let me set one thing straight: I was terrified! I did absolutely not feel couragous when I decided to go my own way in the treatment situation. It was simply a question of chosing between two terrible choices; and doing chemo and radiation frightened me even more than not doing them. Remember - I had already had the experience of curing my arthritis through macrobiotic diet (
After a year with about 12 active inflamations in my joints at the same time (I was in extreme pain; my husband had to brush my teeth[xx(] ); and also being on lots of suppressive medication that didn't cure, but only numbed me to life.One day I simply decided that I would rather be in pain than not be at all. Hence the macrobiotic diet.
Years later - the cancer was diagnosed five weeks before my final exams in homeopathy. I knew by then (from my medical studies) that our body symptoms are a way of balancing an underlying problem. It is not the inflammations or the tumors that are the problem; it is the inner imbalance that causes them. I did, however, not have the guts (
or time...after the diagnosis they gave me one hour to decide what to do..that's another story) to not remove my breast (
I think it very.....fitting, that my left breast is gone. It litterally exposed my heart). As it turned out the cancer had spread to my lymph system. To make a long story short - I quarreled with the doctors; cut all traditional treatments; went back on the macrobiotic diet, took homeopathic remedies, and started to work on becoming visible to myself.
My girls were 4 and 7 at the time, and I lived in constant fear that I would die. It took about 4 years for the fear to subside. It took even longer to getting used to being a one breasted woman. However, it is not like I wish I hadn't removed the breast. On the contrary - it taught me that I am not my self image. That alone has given me an enormous amount of freedom. So - to everyone that has mailed me - I am a completely ordinary girl that was simply "forced" by nature to take another path than most in my situation. You would have done the same if you were in my skin[
].
It is odd that this should surface right now....In the beginning of january 2006 my story was "sniffed up" by some journalist. I was asked to go public in a big weekly magazine in Norway. I thought about it for a second, and then said yes - I want people to know that cancer (or any other disease) can be approached differently. The story ended up being a front page article (I laughed...who would have thought that...me - a cover girl![:I]. Anyway - I have had responses from all over the country; and people have come to my clinic (and sent tons of mails) to get advice. So many beautiful souls out there! It makes me cry when I see that peoples life changes because I got over my fear of being "exposed". Thank you grace!!
I hope this covers what you wanted to know. If not - feel free to mail me. I cannot promise immediate replies, but I can gather up questions under the same topic, and publish my thoughts here - if I find it fitting to the forum.
Thanks for making my life such an adventure!
May all your Nows be Here
