More vs. Just Enough

[Bodhi Tree]

Last night I went into a frenzied kriya where I was rocking back and forth, even shaking spasmodically at times. There was this pulsing desire for more. More bliss, more purification, more opening. That's why I was drawn to AYP from the get-go, because the lessons resonated with my persistent desire for more, which has been with me since I was a child.

But there seems to be a flipside of the coin as well, and that is the desire for just enough. Just enough silence, just enough outflow of divine love, just enough ecstatic bliss. I guess that would be a counterpoint of contentment. When there is contentment, there is this feeling like: "Don't worry, everything is in divine order. There's no way anything can go wrong on a grand scale. All things will be resolved, and every single being is moving towards paradise."

When I was younger, I took a philosophy class called Tension and Balance. The idea is that you need tension between two sides to achieve balance. For me, there is this tension between the inner pull for more and the surrender to what already is. The dynamic is paradoxical. Can I be in state of striving for more, while also being totally content with what is? On the good days, the answer is yes.

Just curious to see if anyone is experiencing this kind of interplay of bhakti and contentment...

[Charliedog]

Hi Bodhi Tree,

I know exactly what you mean, I wake up in the night regularly in a state like that.....
Difficult for me to put it in English words. For me the poems of Rumi describe the feeling.
For me it feels like the Beloved of Rumi....Enjoy!

[Bodhi Tree]

"We are as the flute, and the music in us is from thee;
we are as the mountain and the echo in us is from thee."

[Charliedog]

The deepest longing and at the same time the deepest fulfillment, Divine Passion, The Infinite  

“I am only the house of your beloved,
not the beloved herself:
true love is for the treasure,
not for the coffer that contains it.”
The real beloved is that one who is unique,
who is your beginning and your end.
When you find that one,
you’ll no longer expect anything else:
that is both the manifest and the mystery.
That one is the lord of states of feeling,
dependent on none;
month and year are slaves to that moon.
When he bids the “state,”
it does His bidding;
when that one wills, bodies become spirit.

“Rumi”

[Bodhi Tree]

Nice! Now that's contentment.