Thanks guys for the answers. You say what I suspected
No need to go anywhere, it is all here and now.
But this time it is not that I
need a teacher, it is that sometimes I think I would
like a teacher. It's a growing desire in my heart more than a need. And it happened naturally, like lookign at a sunset. I just feel it would be nice. I felt it when I read other people's stories, from "The Way of the Peaceful Warrior" to "The Chasm of Fire". It just happened, I did not search for it. I just read about these teachers and get fascinated by them. Isn't it how it goes - desire and then acting on it?
I do beleive as well that whatever you need comes to you naturally. Especially if your heart desires it. No need for effort, "just" true desire
Although desire is like a fire inside and as such can require some "effort" to deal with so one does not gets burned
I feel I am happiest when all of this is quite natural - there is a longing inside and then later I find somethign that resonates clearly with it. It is quite magical. It happened with AYP for example
So yes, I do believe that desire brings you what you need or want, sooner or later, but not necessarily how your mind pictures it. True, all the same.
Thanks!