azurikai
USA
17 Posts
Posted - Apr 02 2017 : 11:40:40 AM Show Profile Email Poster Visit azurikai's Homepage Edit Topic Reply with Quote View user's IP address Get a Link to this Message Delete Topic
As I work on these practices, I was initially really feeling a lot of calm and peace, which I still feel... but the peace seems to be subsiding, while anger and other emotions seem to bubble up now.
I feel a lot of progress internally and externally, but a lot of irritability, anger and even disgust is rising within me and wanting to find its way out.
I find myself being quite judgemental at times,
finding the people who live in my area to be disgusting to me (uncleanliness, treating our apartment complex like a pigsty, etc),
and also I am quite irritable when not left alone.
I am sure that I am working through a lot of things inside and they are just coming out...
But it does not make me feel any better not knowing how to manage them properly.
It is recommended a lot of the time to just observe things as they come and go in daily life... is that all there is to it?
It feels so hard at times to simply just observe them before getting swept away in them.
As for the people who live in my apartment complex, one of whom literally urinated all inside of the elevator last night... how are such things best handled? It feels unnatural to feel the preached 'love and acceptance' for all beings when they are literally urinating and throwing trash in the elevator.
It also feels difficult to just observe these feelings, as if these things are leaving emptiness inside of me when they leave. Will joy from practice naturally rise to fill this space?
Thank you for letting me let some of this out, sometimes it is nice to just recognise them in words.
Austin
sunyata
USA
1395 Posts
Posted - Apr 02 2017 : 3:17:05 PM Show Profile Email Poster Edit Reply Reply with Quote View user's IP address Get a Link to this Reply Delete Reply
Hi Austin,
Irritability is a sign of overload, so best to self pace.
This path is about wholeness and not about feeling good all the time. When we learn to accept, allow anger, sadness and the so called negative emotions, then it losses it's charge and bliss/space arises.
If we fight against them/supress them,then it's a never ending battle. Allowing is possible/easier when we are balanced and centered and not so much when we are overloading.
Regarding the apt issue, is there anyone you can speak to i.e. apt manager?
Edited by - sunyata on Apr 02 2017 3:34:59 PM
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Bodhi Tree
2972 Posts
Posted - Apr 02 2017 : 8:34:16 PM Show Profile Email Poster Visit Bodhi Tree's Homepage Edit Reply Reply with Quote View user's IP address Get a Link to this Reply Delete Reply
Anger -----> Chosen Ideal
Further instructions:
http://www.aypsite.com/340.htmlComic relief: The Big Lebowski motif involving micturition upon The Dude's rug.
Cleanliness. Purity. Elegance.
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lalow33
USA
945 Posts
Posted - Apr 02 2017 : 10:42:24 PM Show Profile Email Poster Edit Reply Reply with Quote View user's IP address Get a Link to this Reply Delete Reply
Speak to the person. " Don't urinate in the building." It's not wrong to say that. You can't control what the person does. You can't spiritual practice out of this one.
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azurikai
USA
17 Posts
Posted - Apr 04 2017 : 12:55:41 PM Show Profile Email Poster Visit azurikai's Homepage Edit Reply Reply with Quote View user's IP address Get a Link to this Reply Delete Reply
Sunyata, I have taken into account your thoughts and have worked on setting up a better structure to my lifestyle so that the self pacing can continue optimally. Thank you.
Sunyata, Lalow33.. about the apartment issue it was not so much a request for advice on how to handle it in the physical world... but perhaps of how to properly not be attached to such disturbances.
I am just running into the question of... am I 'letting this go' when I do not let it affect me, or am I accidentally suppressing it?
And Bhodi Tree, thank you so much for the further reading on Bhakti. I have been really working on my devotion and it keeps urging me to get to the mat to work through things. It has helped me a lot in taking my practice more serious as well.
Bhodi Tree, lalow55, sunyata
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kensbikes100
USA
150 Posts
Posted - Jun 18 2017 : 07:57:43 AM Show Profile Email Poster Edit Reply Reply with Quote View user's IP address Get a Link to this Reply Delete Reply
Azurikai, i've found since returning to this yoga path that i am more willing to take gentle but assertive action when a wrong situation arises. Certainly improve your self- pacing and yoga practice, but i would think some action is needed, even if it is for you to find another place to live. But be gentle, don't make yourself their problem.
May i ask where in Germany you live?
